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| Erinn Figg |
Lately, I’ve been wading through a sea of articles on the pros and cons of telecommuting. They seem to be everywhere — on industry news sites, on mainstream news sites, bouncing around various social media outlets. Everyone’s got something to say about the joys or evils of working from home.
I guess Yahoo’s recent and widely publicized decision to end its work-from-home policy has bumped this topic up on the list of Things You Should Have an Opinion About, so I figured I’d throw in my two cents as well.
At Obsidian PR, we have a pretty balanced policy when it comes to telecommuting: do it when it’s necessary (when weather or illness prevents you from driving) or when it fosters more efficiency (e.g. in conjunction with a client meeting near your home).
We’ve had some intelligent discussions in the office about this topic, and I respect the prevalent opinions here. However, if I ruled the world, I’d telecommute more often. Here’s why:
1. I accomplish amazing things in my pajamas.
Please don’t read anything into this statement, but there are days when I hate wearing clothes. As proof, I have three drawers full of pajama bottoms and giant T-shirts. Sadly, this is my outfit of choice these days. (Yep, I’m single. I wonder why.) But when I’m wearing my pink drawstring pajama bottoms with garden gnomes all over them and my huge Atari T-shirt, I feel like I can conquer the world! The unfettered creativity (YES! I said, “unfettered”!) flows through my body like shimmery, liquid gold. Or maybe I’m just too lazy to get dressed. In any case, who cares? I’m not crammed into a pair of Spanx or screwing around with wayward bra straps. I’m happy. I’m comfortable. There are people out there who say the more professionally you dress for work, the more productive you’ll be. I say to those people, “Get better pajamas.”
2. My hair-from-hell is an obstacle to my efficiency.
I did the math one day. It takes about seven minutes for me to take a shower, 10 to 15 minutes to do my hair, at least five minutes to slather about 19 different youth-inducing (don’t we wish) creams on my face, 10 to 15 minutes to do my makeup (20 if the night before was rough), five more minutes to mess around with my hair again, five more minutes to mess around with my face again, and five more minutes to once again mess around with my hair. This is all precious, precious time that I could be using to get work done. When I work at home, I just throw on a pair of glasses and yank the hair up into a ponytail. Sometimes, I’ll get a little sexy and slap on some ChapStick. Of course, if you swing by my place and knock on my front door, there’s no way I’m answering it, but whatever. More work done!
3. My coffee pot.
I can drink 12 consecutive cups, and no one will judge or gape in horrified amazement.
4. The hoopty gets a rest.
I have a 1999 Toyota RAV4. It has approximately 165,000 miles on it and – besides regular oil changes, tune-ups and tire rotations – has never required extensive attention from a mechanic. (Let’s all knock on wood together now, shall we?) But it’s a bit beaten-up at this point, to put it kindly. When I’m rolling in it, I crank up the music, not because I’m cool, but because when I drive in silence I can hear the scary sounds of things creaking and rattling, like I’m dragging a bucket of bolts down the street. And because it looks a little rough around the edges, it gets no respect. People hit it in parking lots all the time and never leave notes. Women in big sunglasses and shiny BMWs cruise by it in disdain. Random neighborhood children write “WASH ME” in its dust. Haters aside, I still treat that car tenderly, like a first-born child. I have awesome memories associated with that car. I’m never selling it. When I finally move on to something else, I’ll get my RAV4 shellacked and mounted. So yeah, when I work at home, the hoopty gets some much-needed rest.
5. Gas.
I commute Downtown from Germantown, and I drive to a lot of client meetings. It costs about $40 to fill up my car, and I use about one-and-a-half tanks of gas a week. So I spend about $60 a week on gas (somewhere out there, my sixth-grade math teacher is clapping), which comes to about $240 a month (standing ovation). That’s money I could be spending on shoes. SHOES, I SAID! Somebody hold me.
6. Ch’i.
I used to be the PR director for the world-renowned health resort Canyon Ranch. Unfortunately, most people around here don’t realize it’s world-renowned, so go ahead and Google it. I’ll wait . . . OK, so anyway, if you need to pull yourself together and get your body, mind and digestive system balanced, Canyon Ranch is the destination for you. And thanks to that job, I have a deep appreciation for the Chinese concept of energy force called ch’i. As such, I’ve got everything in my room artfully placed so the ch’i not only flows, it cavorts. If you happen to be my PR client and I happen to write your news release at home, it will be touched by my magical ch’i (and possibly fingers covered with microwaved-pizza grease. But mainly ch’i).
7. My cats.
I have two of them. I rescued them from a shelter. They like to hang out with me while I work and keep an eye on what I’m doing. Occasionally, one of them will stick out a paw and try to type something. They are excellent commentators. They’re also excellent proofreaders.
8. Memphis drivers.
I get to avoid them. Enough said.
Erinn Figg wrote this highly caffeinated blog post in pajamas while working at home. As such, it is touched by magical ch’i and has been proofed by two cats.
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| Erinn Figg |
Like many people, I’m currently engrossed in the Jodi Arias trial in Phoenix. Sometimes, I listen to it with an earbud in one ear while I work. Occasionally, I’ll check out the live video stream during my lunch hour. When I get home from work, I usually spend a mindless hour or two watching CNN’s HLN network, which has turned into the “All Jodi Arias, All the Time Channel.” And I’m doing things I never thought I’d ever do, like tweet Nancy Grace (she never tweets back by the way).
If you have no idea what I’m talking about, here it is in a nutshell: Attractive girl in Yreka, Calif., drives to Mesa, Ariz., stabs her ex-boyfriend 27 times, slits his throat, shoots him in the head and calls it self-defense. She claims she had been abused and degraded throughout their relationship. His friends and family claim she was a nutso stalker. It reminds everyone of the Casey Anthony trial in that her guilt seems so cut and dry, yet everyone’s waiting to see if she’s going to succeed in winning over the jury with her “poor little me” stories and a bit of reasonable doubt. If convicted of first-degree murder, Arias faces the death penalty. Her testimony (19 days of it, to be exact) is long and dramatic with lots and lots (and lots) of graphic sexual details. Obviously, I can’t get into them here, but let’s just say I am never going to be able to eat a Tootsie Pop again.
I think we’re on Day 9,000 of this trial by now. And whenever I watch it, I can’t help but analyze some of the key players from a PR perspective.
Take prosecutor Juan Martinez, for example. He’s totally not my type, but I’ve developed kind of a weird crush on him. I think it’s the combination of intellect, confidence and ferocity that does it for me. So remember that, men of the world. If you don’t have women chasing you around, try acting a little more feisty. Go ahead and roll your eyes, but hey, I get paid big bucks to give this kind of advice. (OK, make that “some bucks.” But they’re still bucks.)
My hormones aside, Martinez wins my award for Person I’d Most Like to Toss Back a Couple of Martinis With. (See? He even makes me want to throw caution to the wind and end sentences with prepositions.) I’d get some drinks in him and tell him to tone it down just a little. I’d tell him it makes me a little sad when he YELLS AT nice older ladies with spiky hair. I would generously bestow my valuable courtroom PR counsel upon him and tell him there’s a fine line between displaying your passion and looking like a character on “Ally McBeal.” And then I would run like hell. Because dang, that guy is kind of a gunslinger. Don’t get on his bad side.
Moving on to lead defense attorney Kirk Nurmi, I’d tell him to stop wearing ties and socks that look like optical illusions. It’s like he’s trying to win a spot in the Striped Socks Hall of Fame or something. MY EYES, MR. NURMI! Have a little mercy!
We always tell our PR clients not to wear bold patterns on television. As evident here, it can sometimes result in viewers covering their eyes and wailing. It’s hard for people to hear your key messages over their agonized screams of pain.
As for Jodi Arias, well, she’s got me a little stumped, actually. She used to be a vivacious-looking blond bombshell that radiated sex. It’s clear from various testimonies that she hypnotized almost every man who crossed her path. Now in court, they’ve got her all frumped up. Her hair is dark brown and kind of plastered to her skull. She’s wearing big glasses and absolutely no makeup. Her drab clothes look like they came from the Opposite of Sexy section of her local thrift shop. She looks like a meek, worn-out librarian.
I can’t tell if the make-under is helping or hurting her. Sure, she doesn’t look like a trampy sex machine anymore, but she’s also lost her magic powers to enchant men and even fascinate women on the jury. She has transformed from eye candy into someone that’s downright unpleasant looking. It’s unsettling. I think in trying to make her appear mousey and harmless, her lawyers accidentally made her look like a serial killer.
In fact, lately Jodi Arias has really got me thinking about the power of appearances – how someone can go from seeming influential and magnetic to helpless and ineffectual just by changing her (or his) hair, clothes and body language. It makes me want to hire a stylist, actually. And possibly bleach my hair. And maybe stop wearing comfortable oversized cardigans and PajamaJeans in public.
That’s about it. Did you think this post was going to be full of sage advice and deep, intellectual insights on the Jodi Arias trial? Oops, sorry.
I guess I can leave you with this one last suggestion: If you don’t like the way your life is going, try changing your hair and buying new clothes. Heck, some of us women have been doing it for years.
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| Erinn Figg |
A friend of mine called me the other day seeking PR advice. (Yep – if you’re my friend and you need PR counsel, I can be bought with a white chocolate mocha. Or even better, a glass of pinot noir.)
I agreed to meet this friend over a couple of adult beverages. When I got there, he was drowning – not in vodka, but in industry terminology.
He had just gotten out of a meeting with a PR consultant and was floundering around in acronyms such as SEO, SMT, MCM and ROI. He was treading through buzzwords like crowdsourcing, digital ecosystem, tablet marketing, vertical media and – my personal all-time favorite (not really) – “low-hanging fruit.”
This friend, a doctor who specializes in cosmetic procedures, had been loading up on so much information from so many PR “how-to” articles and consultants that his brain finally blared “DOES NOT COMPUTE!” and refused to process any of it anymore.
He told me he was trying to think outside the box. I told him to forget the box. Stash it away somewhere. That box is probably exhausted anyway from being in a phrase that’s used about 90 million times a day. In fact, I’m sure that box is longing for a vacation. Maybe we could pack some low-hanging fruit in it and ship it to Cancun.
I asked my friend the same thing I ask anyone who tells me they feel adrift in a sea of PR and marketing decisions: When was the last time you took a break from thinking like a business owner and tried thinking like your customer?
So I gave my friend a checklist of questions to help him think like a patient who’s trying to choose a doctor. Here are a few of them. Although some of these questions apply to his business, they all have a universal theme: What is your target customer looking for, and does your public persona reflect your unparalleled ability to meet that need?
1. WEBSITE: Take a good hard look at your website. I’m sure it’s packed with confident and enthusiastic language. That’s fine – copywriters need love, too. But what’s the ratio of marketing dialogue to useful information? Do visitors leave your website feeling educated? Do you have a gazillion – YES, a gazillion! – quality photos that showcase your work, particularly before and after shots? Do you have detailed descriptions of your procedures? (If so, you’re providing authoritative information to counter the misinformation, horror stories and scary photos your potential client will most likely find in a Google search.) Do you have a Frequently Asked Questions page? Does your website offer several ways for visitors to contact you with questions? Are you frequently sharing your knowledge and industry news with your website visitors? Actually, that question leads to the next topic.
2. EXPERTISE: You’re the next best thing to the Fountain of Youth, and you’ve got a wealth of information to help people look and feel more attractive. Are you giving away that info on a regular basis? Oh yes! I said, “giving it away”! Sharing valuable tips and advice demonstrates your expertise as well as your genuine desire to help others. Does your website have a blog that addresses relative topics? Is its tone informative or does it read like a sales pitch? (If it’s the latter, please hold out your hand so I can smack it with a ruler.) Are you also sharing useful information through Facebook, Twitter and other social media outlets? There are some great forums out there for consumers seeking advice and answers about products and services. Are you occasionally chiming in on those forums with advice and answers to their questions? DON’T FORGET: Getting your brain out there is just as important as getting your name out there. (Somebody put that phrase on a T-shirt!)
3. CUSTOMERS: You’ve got consultation patients that are a little jittery in your waiting room. They’re wondering if they’re making the right decision. They’re dealing with the reality that they’re about to let someone alter their faces and bodies. So what are you doing to nurture these people? Is your office a comforting environment? Is your receptionist warm and welcoming? Are you offering them a beverage while they wait or using small, meaningful gestures to give them the royal treatment? Do you have a binder of your media coverage accessible so patients can flip through it and recognize you as an expert in your field? From the moment your customers/clients/patients walk through your door, your place of business should speak to them: “You are welcome here. You are safe here. We care about you. We want you to be happy – even if you ultimately choose to go somewhere else.” Word of mouth is one of the most powerful PR tools we can use. Make a fabulous impression on your customers and they’ll tell people about it.
For small business owners who don’t have an agency to navigate them through a sea of PR strategies and initiatives, the process can get a little overwhelming. If it happens to you, just shift your perspective. Think about your own buying habits and the factors that influenced those decisions. Think about the brands you love and the reasons you love them. Then think about why you love your own business and how you can convey that passion to others. Sometimes, we have to get back to our roots in order to keep growing. I think Yoda said that. Or Mr. Rogers. Either way, I like it.
