Tirades and Tantrums

Daniel Wade

Do you remember the last time someone yelled at you at work? Maybe that person became angry, for whatever reason, and communicated displeasure or disagreement with your idea by using cutting or sarcastic language. And while this person didn’t overturn desks or anything (I hope), he or she pretty much threw the adult version of a tantrum. Usually, this type of interaction only breeds negativity and can strain relationships in the workplace. I truly hope this scenario isn’t very familiar!

Renowned marketer Seth Godin brought up an interesting perspective on these types of interactions recently. He says in some industries and workplaces, we allow this behavior because it elicits a response – the “one who yells the loudest gets the attention” sort of philosophy. But, surgeons don’t have to raise their voices and pilots don’t scream at air traffic control to get what they need, says Godin. They are professionals; they merely ask. You see, we give the yellers and tantrum-throwers power when we respond to their actions. What would happen if we didn’t validate them and only responded to appropriate communication?

Photo Courtesy to Flickr User Cecilie Sonsteby

Or, look at it this way. Let’s say you have a need or request that just isn’t getting the desired outcome at the office. Are you doing the equivalent of the Big Bad Wolf and huffing and puffing to get your way? If so, try adjusting your communication approach and see what happens. Professionalism and respectful interaction go a long way toward achieving your desired outcome, regardless of your place on the proverbial totem pole. Besides, as Godin says, “A pitfall of throwing tantrums is that sometimes, people throw them back.”

Set out to define your workplace culture as a place of respectful and professional interaction at all times. If you struggle in that effort, and you very well may, make it part of your personal culture and creed to do so. My guess is you’ll be pleased with the results. 

How to Communicate as a Dance Coach

Jenn Taylor

Being a dance coach takes a rare breed of an individual. With an eight-month long season, November and January being the most chaotic months of the year, and typically working with more than 10 pre-teen or teenage girls at a time, it is a unique job in itself.

I have been coaching since January 2010, and I have to say that I have learned a lot of things, mostly life lessons that I attempt to put into action in other aspects of my life. One lesson that comes to mind is communication. I like to think that communicating effectively is important with any job, but after coaching, I have found that it is vital to even survive in this profession. 

Some things I struggled with, and am still working on as a coach, are remembering who I am speaking to,  thinking about how I am speaking to them, and realizing I need to say what I mean in a way that they can relate to. I also wonder how much communication is too much communication? And, do I really know what I am talking about after all?

I had to learn that these girls depend on my direction and need to know what I want and expect from them.  

WHO AM I SPEAKING TO AND HOW DO I SAY WHAT I MEAN IN A WAY THAT THEY CAN RELATE TO?

It is important to alter the word usage or form of communication when talking to different groups of people. In my case, this is the first year that I am coaching two completely different age groups, a middle school and a high school team. I would not say something to motivate my middle school team the way I would my high school team. My middle school team has to constantly be motivated and reminded of what to do, what not to do and how to do it, which is normal for any kids in that age group. On the contrary, I try to not only guide my high school team in what they should be doing, but I also try to communicate the advantages of working hard – such as landing a scholarship for a college dance team. Another thing I have to constantly do is try to take out manage the frustration that I often feel during a practice and take the time to explain why I am frustrated and show them how to fix whatever we are working on. The key to communication is being thorough and having a goal behind your message. 

HOW MUCH COMMUNICATION IS TOO MUCH COMMUNICATION?

In order to stay on task throughout the dance season and continue to have effective practices, I have to make sure that what is being said in practice is not just chatter but that it is relevant to the particular practice. I realized early on in coaching, as in any authoritative position, that you have control the conversation’s direction and overall intention. Even though it humors me to listen to my middle school ladies chat about who is going out with out who or who loves or hates Justin Bieber, we would not get anywhere with that being our only conversation at practice. I also try to say things in a direct, non-biased way, which allows the dancer to fix her personal mistake rather than worrying about other dancers around her. 

DO I REALLY KNOW WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT?

In any job setting, the team under the authoritative figure should trust and believe in what they are being taught as true and valid. This is crucial in a dance practice to maintain safety, progression of the dancer and the overall success of the program. This communication skill is highly imperative in order for them achieve their goals. If a dancer doubts my credibility or knowledge as a coach, then they are more likely to doubt my coaching methods. Overall, that would end in the team hitting a brick wall, consequently getting nowhere. 

While these three communication skills have been something I’ve learned specifically in my experience as a dance teacher, I believe they should be applied to all different types of jobs so the professional environment runs smoothly. 

If it's worth a response, think it through

Kim Morrison

It was a day like any other day in the late 80s/early 90s, and since it was a day that ended in the letter ‘Y’, my little brother and I were fighting. While growing up, we were constantly fighting. Someone did this, someone took that, someone looked at the other crazy… You get the general idea.

This fight was no different. At some point in the argument, I yelled, “I’M GONNA GO TELL DAD,” who was outside talking with one of the neighbors. This started a back-and- forth of uh-huhs and nuh-uhs, and at some point, I took off running full speed out the front door to tell my dad the horrible, awful, stupid, annoying, etc. thing my brother had done. 

As I reached my dad and the neighbor, they were in the middle of a conversation, and while I can’t remember how old I was when this happened, I was old enough to know you didn’t interrupt adults when they were talking. So, I stood there, and anxiously waited to be acknowledged so I could do the sisterly thing and snitch on my brother. I never got that chance.

Before my dad and the neighbor were done talking, my little brother came flying out the front door, flailing, screaming and hollering at the top of his lungs, “SHE’S LYING DAD! DON’T LISTEN TO HER! I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING!” As soon as he got to where we were, Dad simply looked at him and said, “What did you do?”
 
Cute story, but what the heck does it have to do with PR? Don’t be my little brother. Yes, something bad happened, and yes, you should respond, but don’t just wing it and hope for the best. Don’t freak out and just blurt out the first thing that crosses your mind. Stop, calm down and think it over for a minute. Is this worth responding to? If so, then respond in a way that addresses the situation, contributes to the conversation and hopefully places you in a better light than you were in before you started speaking. If it’s worth responding to, then it’s worth responding to properly.

Hissssssssssssssssssssssss. Are you paying attention to body language?

Courtney Liebenrood Ellett

From top: Friday Cat and Sid

Meet Sid (also known as Work Cat) and Friday Cat (who likes to show his cute little face mostly on Fridays, thus his namesake).

These two furry guys are our adoptive kitty cats at Obsidian. In an effort to make them more comfortable being around people, our colleagues have been taking shifts to work on our laptops on our office back patio when the cats are around.

A team member and I were meeting out there recently, and Sid came out first. He nervously paced and made attempts to come near us, where the food was sitting. And he finally did eat. A few minutes later, we heard a deep meow that didn’t come from Sid.

Enter Friday Cat. He was perched on the ledge above and made his way down to us. Friday Cat is friendlier and kept meowing deeply to say hello as he approached us. We encouraged him to take part in the food as Sid did. As Friday Cat came closer to us, Sid starting hissing wildly from the corner of the patio, where he was ducking behind a plant.

Translation: Don’t come any closer, man, or you’re going to find a heap of trouble.

We tried to avert a bitter clash by continuing to coax Friday Cat toward us instead of Sid. Well, Friday Cat wasn’t paying attention to body language and what Sid was “saying.” He just waltzed right over to Sid behind that plant. A quick confrontation passed, and it was done.

The signs were all there. Sid was hiding himself to feel more comfortable. He then hissed to verbalize his warning. And finally, he pounced on Friday Cat. But it should never have gone so far. If Friday Cat would have paid attention the signs, trouble would have been averted and he wouldn’t have felt the sting of Sid’s paws.

This lesson can be easily applied to our role in PR and even in our daily lives. There are a million tiny clues in human interaction that help us better understand mood, relationships, expectations, what people care about, what they don’t care about, what they need, etc. Mostly importantly, these clues help us know how to respond appropriately. If we don’t pay attention to positioning, body language, tone and the actual message, communication breaks down. And a cat fight might be the result.

Honesty is the best policy!

 

Kelli Eason

Lance Armstrong.

Manti Te’o.

Bernie Madoff.

Aside from the fact that they are all well-known American figures, it’s not hard to guess what these three have in common. They all got caught in a lie of some sort. It affected them all differently, but ultimately damaged each of their personal brands.

Bernie Madoff was caught in a major Ponzi scheme, lying to his clients and costing a lot of people a lot of money. It cost him his personal fortune, his estate, his career and his freedom outside prison walls. Lance Armstrong was caught lying about using illegal substances to help him win the Tour de France seven times in a row – and it cost him his titles, future racing opportunities and endorsement dollars. Manti Te’o was the heartbreaking story of the 2012 college football season after his grandmother and girlfriend died in the same week…until the world found out there was no such girlfriend. Te’o is new to this group, so we have yet to determine exactly how his brand will be tarnished by the scandal. 

Working in the field of public relations, my first thought when these types of scandals break is that these guys’ publicists won’t be sleeping much for a while. My second thought is how I would handle it.

If you’ve ever dealt with a crisis situation like this, you know that there should always be a PR practitioner at the table. With that in mind, I would advise the following:

1.    Don’t do wrong or unethical things in the first place.

It’s too late for Lance Armstrong. He made poor choices for way too long to have them just disappear now. But it’s not too late for most people – companies or individuals. If something is wrong, make it right. When faced with a potentially damaging situation, take the high road. Don’t let yourself get caught up in scandals that could ruin lives (as Madoff did) or ruin your career or brand (like Armstrong or Te’o). 

If you’re unsure of whether you’re being confronted with an ethical situation, PRSA has a handy Code of Ethics available to help identify and overcome those situations, as do many other professional organizations.

2.    If you find yourself caught up in a situation like this, honesty is the best policy.

I watched a segment on The Today Show a few weeks ago in which Star Jones recommended, from a legal standpoint, that Lance Armstrong never admit to doping. In her eyes, it would severely damage his personal brand and therefore his ability to make money from future endorsements, speaking engagements or even future competitions. But Star Jones is a lawyer, not a PR practitioner. Public relations is all about building trust and building a strong personal brand no matter what. With all Armstrong’s former teammates saying he used illegal substances, it became increasingly difficult for him to convince anyone that he was telling the truth.

The same could be said of Manti Te’o. Today the official statement from the Te’o family and from Notre Dame is that Te’o was the victim of a cruel prank. The rest of the world is still confused. Even according to official statements, Te’o knew about the hoax on Dec. 6, yet he still spoke about the girl two days later at the Heisman ceremony. Without the whole truth, people will think the worst no matter what.

3.    Make your brand a priority.

This is true in any situation, not just those that involve a lie. In Lance Armstrong’s case, he has been an important advocate for the cancer community. A close friend of mine lives in Austin, Texas – where Livestrong is headquartered. She recently beat lymphoma and is very supportive of the Livestrong organization separate from Armstrong. In her blog, she acknowledges his mistakes but hopes that the charity – which has since severed ties with Armstrong – continues to thrive and support cancer survivors.

Bernie Madoff can, of course, never recover from his lie. He is serving his prison sentence for a variety of felonies related to his Ponzi scheme. In Madoff’s case, he owned his company, which went under with him. Had he been part of a larger bank or investment group with the strength to survive such a scandal, he likely would have been a casualty of the company’s rebuilding.

In Manti Te’o’s case, he may overcome this, depending on whether he tells the whole truth before it’s too late. There is still time before the NFL draft, for which he was previously projected to be a first-round pick. I’ll be watching the news for more information, and will be interested to see how the NFL considers his personal brand along with his talents as a player.

Have any thoughts about this blog? Leave it in the comments and we can discuss it there.

Coming Together – The Benefit and Importance of Professional Organizations

Kelli Eason

I graduated college in May of 2009. I worried, of course, about finding a job in the recession. I thought I had a pretty good shot at getting hired from a previous internship, but by the time I graduated and the market had sufficiently tanked, most of my previous supervisors were in no place to hire new communications staff. That’s where the Public Relations Society of America came in.

In college, I joined the Public Relations Student Society of America, which led to my involvement in its parent organization, PRSA. In the past five years, I have served in seven leadership positions, traveled to four national events, made too many close friends to count and, last but not least, been hired for two internships and two full-time jobs as a result of my involvement.

How did PRSA come to support my job hunt in the worst part of a recession? That’s easy – it’s all about who you know. In one of my last projects at LSU, I participated in a student campaign competition through PRSSA. During that project, I met a local PR spokesperson who hired me for my first post-graduate job just a few months later. When I was ready to move to Memphis, PRSA once again supported my search. After posting my resume to the PRSA Memphis website, I received an email from Courtney Liebenrood Ellett, who I now work with at Obsidian Public Relations.

So what if you’re not looking for a job? That’s great. PRSA or any other professional organization can still serve as a good resource. In the past few months, I’ve had the opportunity to learn firsthand about Duncan-Williams’ popular Live at the Garden YouTube videos, how Anthony Siracusa transformed Memphis’ bicycling culture and the role communications plays in corporate culture from the CEO of First Horizon. The regular luncheons are a great way to get an inside look into the industry, as well as an opportunity to meet other PR pros in town.

Looking for more information on PRSA? Check out the Memphis Chapter’s website by clicking here and the Dallas Chapter by clicking here.

The Interview - What You Need to Know

Katie Pemberton

So, you got a reporter to agree to write a story about you? That’s great! Media coverage in respected publications and programs can make a huge impact on awareness of your company. But just because you’ve gotten the story, that doesn’t mean the work is over…the interview is the most important part! Yes, you will be talking about your company and/or yourself, a topic you are extremely familiar with. But just because you know your subject matter doesn’t necessarily mean you know the best way to present it.

At Obsidian, a major part of what we do is preparing clients and their representatives for interviews, whether it’s a live in-studio TV or radio interview, a taped TV interview or a phone interview. Several of our clients have very media-savvy CEOs who have a lot of interview experience; in those cases, our media prep may be limited to sending a list of potential questions the interviewer might ask. In many cases, though, especially with representatives who have less media experience, we go much more in-depth. For the kinds of interviewing advice we dispense to our clients, read on. 

• Prepare. Have any statistics, testimonials and other data handy so you can refer to it and give the reporter meaningful information to support your argument(s). Consider what kinds of questions the reporter might ask and practice your responses to those. Have someone you trust give you a mock interview to give you feedback on your answers and delivery. 
• If you don’t know the answer, do NOT guess. It’s OK if you are doing an interview about a local hunger initiative and you don’t know how many people worldwide go hungry. But be honest about that and don’t guess the number—you never know who might repeat that number and use it again. In a case like this one, respond this way, “I’m actually not sure about the global hunger statistics, but what I can tell you is that one in four people in our community are uncertain where their next meal is coming from.” Remember that “what I can tell you” phrase. It will become a powerful tool in your interviewing arsenal.
• Keep the interview on track. Especially in a live interview, the line of questioning can go off the rails quickly. Yes, it is the interviewer’s job to stay on topic, but you must share that burden if you want your message to be heard. You have secured precious and valuable time with a reporter—do NOT let it be squandered by going off topic. The first step in this piece of advice is to make sure that you pitch the reporter or producer accurately and honestly (don’t sell the reporter on one thing and expect to bait-and-switch her into writing about something else).  If the interviewer at some point goes off topic, that’s when you pull out your “what I can tell you” trick! Respond to an off-topic question with this phrase, “I don’t know about that, but what I can tell you is that…”
• Speak only for yourself and your organization. There are very few scenarios in which you should talk about any other organization, and certainly you should never bad-mouth another organization. Don’t fall into the “what do you think” trap. “What do you think about Competitor X’s announcement that they’re cutting jobs in Tennessee?” or “What do you think about Competitor X’s new product?” Don’t feel that you HAVE to answer questions that make you uncomfortable, but know that “no comment” is not the right way to handle these types of questions. I would counsel my client to respond with something like, “I can’t speak for Competitor X, but what I can tell you (there it is again!) is that we have created 24 new jobs in the Memphis area in the past year.” Bring the attention away from other organizations and back to your company.
• Use positive language, and in your response, avoid repeating any negative language that may be in a reporter’s question. 
• Don’t use jargon unless you are interviewing with a reporter who works only in your industry. For example, if you’re in logistics, a writer for Logistics Business, a trade magazine. Otherwise, speak in layman’s terms.
• Channel your mother’s voice in your head, and sit up straight, use positive body language and be aware of your facial expressions. For TV interviews, I tell clients, “Sit up so straight you feel stupid, and smile almost to the point of feeling stupid.” For most of us who are not on TV all the time, having perfect posture and smiling constantly do not feel natural. But when you watch your interview back later, you’ll be glad if you sat up straight and smiled, and probably not like the way you looked if you slouched and frowned or had a neutral face. The exception to this rule would be any controversial or serious topic. Your facial expressions should be appropriate to the content.

Remember, every interview or scenario is different. The first piece of advice I gave is the most important one: prepare. Whether you do that with a colleague, friend or a trusted PR partner, you will never regret investing an hour into your company’s reputation.

We interrupt this revolution…with the smell of steaks!

Thomas Whitehead

Okay, we get it. Social and digital media are here to stay and will continue to dominate the communication and marketing forum for companies and organizations. But, it is absolutely vital for PR professionals, companies and organizations to not put all their communication “eggs” into one social media basket. Rather, it is necessary to view it as just another part of your arsenal along with news features, television, radio, print ads, events, speaking engagements and other promotional materials.

With that in mind, I would like to speak out for one of my favorite and most entertaining forms of communicating a company’s message: the old fashioned billboard. Yes, that is right. Even after all of these years and new means of communication, there is still a need for companies to share their message and stories on a billboard.

I am fascinated by the challenges this gives companies. Mainly, I am curious how a billboard is created in a way that will be on-message in a clear, concise way for people traveling by it at 75 MPH. It is definitely an issue.
 
And, quite honestly, I am still baffled that organizations still spend very good money for billboards that have a large amount of copy on it. Yet, this still happens very frequently.
Instead, the best strategy for making a billboard work for your company is to have a compelling, creative visual image that will earn the average, slightly distracted driver’s attention for 2.6 seconds enough to retain the information offered.
 
In addition to the image, a two- to four-word phrase can also help shape what message you are looking to share with your broad audience of motorists.
 

Photo: Huffington Post

Probably my favorite billboard ever is one from Bloom, a grocery store chain in North Carolina. They actually created a scented billboard with the image of steak on a fork. The really creative part is they were pumping the smell of black pepper and charcoal as drivers were on their way home, pondering what to fix for dinner that evening. This is a great example of how people will remember your brand.
 
So, when deciding what should be your next major social media or advertising campaign, don’t completely forget or ignore the power that billboards can have in shaping and reinforcing your message to your broad, general audiences.
 
And, if all else fails, there is always steak. 

One is the loneliest number...or is it?

Crissy Lintner

In public relations, there are many approaches to building a client base. Some firms choose to focus their efforts on one niche – hospitality, city branding, retail, technology, etc. And they are very good at what they do. Others, like Obsidian, take a different approach by only working with one client from a certain industry or sector of business in a geographic region. We call that category exclusivity.

This may have you thinking, “Doesn’t that limit your ability to do business?” Well, yes and no. At times, we do find ourselves turning away business because we already represent a law firm in Memphis or an animal welfare organization in Dallas. But, the benefit far outweighs this downside (and PR business is abundant across hundreds of industries).

Our main reason for adhering to this philosophy is that as PR professionals, we never want our clients – or account representatives for that matter – to compete against one another for opportunities. If I had to choose between two architects for a Wall Street Journal article that can only feature one source, how would I determine whom to feature? It becomes an ethical dilemma and frankly, hard to keep track of who got the last interview opportunity. 

By only representing one client in an industry at each of our locations, we can maximize our efforts more efficiently and provide the best counsel possible without our clients worrying that they’re missing out because we also represent their competitors.

One can be a lonely number, but when it comes to PR, we think it’s the only way to go!

“Hey client, are you there?”

Lauren Hannaford

Like many industries, PR pros occasionally run into clients who understand the importance and value of PR, but for various reasons, have a hard time carving out ample time to communicate with their communication team and provide what’s needed to execute strategy in a timely manner.

Over the years, we have personally seen strong satisfaction and success correlations among clients who are communicative, set a certain time during the week to talk to us or assign another staff member to be our point person. We stay on track, we get things done and we are successful. Now, many of our clients who simply cannot keep up with us each week are still very successful accounts. There are many paths we take to ensure that we continue to garner news coverage and carry out other projects. We just have to have “information transfer” meetings. And that works, too.

Similarly, we see correlations among clients who aren’t the most communicative in the bunch. While we love all clients nevertheless, this lack of communication can create staleness or a stall in action for the account, and we just don’t like that. We like to stay busy for all clients all of the time. That’s what we get paid to do!

The simple truth is that if you are considering retaining a public relations firm like Obsidian, expect for us to “need” you on a regular basis. The key to a successful relationship is regular communication.

Here are a few helpful tips on how to keep things on track despite your busy schedule:

1. Set a certain time during the week to review projects and communication, and provide feedback on those. 
2. Assign a point person that has time within their role to be a liaison. 
3. If weekly call is not possible, plan to have a longer meeting once a month. 
4. Vocalize your preferences on how we communicate with you (phone, email, text, etc.)